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Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Ok, I promise this is the last episode of Pad Racing! By the end of this episode we will know who the winner will be. Whether it be AJ, one of the other crewmates, Grandpa Joe, or even one of the sluggogian crime lord drivers. Hell, it might even be Tony Pepperoni. AJ starts out this episode with a big lead, and h…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! And…They’re off! The race (finally) begins! With around 50 other racers, this may be a bit of a challenge. Luckily for them, all they need to do is finish alive in order to collect a fair bit of money! For the Lesbian Mafia, AJ Worshington needs to win. They’ve given him every advantage they can. However, it seems…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The crew is almost ready for the race! They’ve bought their pads, and paid a pretty penny, but something seems to be missing. Oh yeah! They need to get those things suped up! Since the race is on Hutteeze, it’s a good bet that there is a good mechanic somewhere on this crappy planet. Meanwhile, apparently AJ has h…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Our crew arrives at Hutteeze with hippies safely in hand. However, a blast from the past for Joran reaches out and asks for his help. Little is known of Joran before he joined the Tritan at the beginning of the season. He has mentioned working for the Lesbian Mafia a time or two, and now, they’ve come calling. On …
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! So it seems the Coalition Of Planets is not necessarily all the way dead. However, they did leave the crew completely high and dry as the Tenebra showed up. I mean, I’d do the same to these assholes. Luckily for them, an unexpected visitor arrives to aid them. Now, they have a new mission. To travel back across th…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The crew still hasn’t quite completed their mission yet. One more ship to search, at least this one seems like it will be easy, since it’s a Murican ship and not a Mutagos ship. Unless of course, some other ship shows up to make sure there aren’t any dirty scavengers lurking about. If they can manage to get out of…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! This new crew is in need of some fuel. So, they have taken an odd job to make a little money. They must find some power crystals. These crystals are typically found on Mutagos ships. Luckily for them, they know where a battle has just concluded between the Muricans and the Mutagos. There are plenty of now derelict…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Another time jump! This time, however, it is only a year. So much has changed however! Because the crew’s ship was a little too hot and everyone was looking for it, they parked it in an asteroid in an uncontrolled part of space. Speaking of control, the battle lines have been drawn and numerous sectors of space ha…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Something is very wrong with Todd. He hasn’t really felt like himself since leaving Hutteeze. He won his title belt, he was on top of the world, running away from Slugogians...and then...something just feels like its missing. He hasn’t even live casted in days. He still hasn’t found his phone. It looks just like M…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Having just ruined another planet, or at least part of a planet, and causing possible civil unrest, the crew have to decide where to go next! Well, there is one more piece of the three coded messages that they need to decipher. A space station not far from Planet Bell Grande 4. In a strange twist of fate, Jon deci…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! It seems this planet has been hiding some serious technology behind the facade of tribalism. Is this really the work of all the people of this planet, or these “Kernel CIO’s?” The crew has made it to the main computer of one of these three main hubs. If they could only unlock the information contained within, mayb…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Having just landed on a planet, that to their knowledge has never been visited, the group has been invited to a party! Although, the locals may need to clear that with the village elder. I’m sure she will have no problems with that though, I mean...the crew was sent by the gods! As long as she doesn’t know any bet…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Another planet visited, another large group of lives ruined. Although to be fair, they did rescue a few of those tree babies....and I’m sure nothing bad will happen to them. Ever. Meanwhile, the crew has decided to visit another planet: Lutestea. This is a planet that according to the CoP database, has never been …
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Joran has now been introduced to the recent history of the planet known as Mianzee. The trees then ask the group to help them deal with the Pandomos instead of the crew working for the Pandomos. However, the Pandomos offered them things they want so the choice to genocide comes easily and naturally. The captain re…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! No good deed goes unpunished. At least Todd isn’t dead...technically. Sure, he’s now in an explorer bot. A weak, inquisitive bot who can’t handle alcohol. Basically, the crew took away Todd’s reason for living, but without giving him the sweet release of death. Now, the crew still needs the Pandomos to decipher th…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Todd sent his Toddlers off to die. He doesn’t have that big of a fan base, maybe he shouldn’t get them killed. K3V however has made it to the planet he was searching for. Now the Pandomos don’t know what to do. There is a rogue AI who is sentient that is demanding a robot body so that it can experience life and go…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Well, at least they managed to get out of that space station in one piece! They also happened to get some free suits in the process! Oh, what’s this? M4C1 went and stuck his zipdick in something and caught a bit of a sentient program? Who would have thought. Now, they have to deal with a rogue AI that wants who kn…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The crew has decided to investigate an abandoned space station just outside of a wormhole. Hey, on the bright side, free space station! However, it seems there’s something...off about this station. The elevator tried to kill Todd and who knows what else is waiting for those on both ends of the station. A strange e…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Now that the crew are finally free of the Sluggogians, they have their entire, sure to be really long, lives ahead of them! One thing that remains to be solved is what was on that thumb stick from Admiral Latvi? Well it seems to be a coded message with the songs from the Top Gun Soundtrack. I’m sure these dinguses…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Wow, they actually managed to get to the ship alive! For the most part anyways. Sure, a few dead crew here and there...and a few dead Foundlings...But hey, ya can’t have a successful escape without exploding a few skulls. Ursyla even showed up! Go figure. Now, they just have to fly away. That’s not too hard right?…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! This is it! It all comes down to this. Todd, or Thotulese was successful in his fight. Joran and Arcturus successfully removed the bombs. The getaway has been planned. Now, all the group needs to do is run from one end of the facility to the other without getting caught or killed. However, these mobster Sluggogian…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! The plan is underway! The plan to escape that is! M4C1 has found Ursyla along with their ship, so that’s part one of the plan that’s done. Next up is the heavy weight bout of Todd’s life as he takes on the mighty Klorpok! Todd of course, goes by the name Thotulese. While this fight is going on the crew has to figu…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! So the crew has a plan to get out of being acquisitions. I’m sure it will all go off without a hitch and there will be no issues whatsoever. However, they have some things to do before then. Preparations must be made! M4C1 has a job to do, but he also needs to find a way off the planet for the crew. Todd has to pr…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Well, so much for that storyline. They had a new fancy ship, their first mission and a glorious coalition to expand. Lost their ship, never went on the mission and the coalition blew up. Now they are stuck on the Sluggogian homeworld of Hutteeze. Not just stuck, but they have all been “acquired” by the crime lord …
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! They get a new ship, first of its kind, and in five minutes they already find a way to break it. Not to mention, they didn’t even notice the swarm of Freeb coming their way. Now they have limited engines and are faced with a horrible enemy. In order to get away they are going to need to do something about those en…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Welcome to Season 5! It’s finally here! In case you weren’t paying attention up until now, or if you’re new, this season will be set in space. This is the far flung future of Earth where there are a Coalition of Planets. A group of species from multiple planets with the goal of discovering more alien races to join…
 
Hey everyone! Season 5 has arrived! Well, sort of. Season 5 will be coming out shortly after this, but this episode is our character building session that we did live on twitch. It doesn't have the normal D&D feel, but you do get to experience a little behind the scenes as we build our characters for Season 5. On top of all that you also get a lot …
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! One more tweener to go until Season 5! In the grand finale of Phil’s first try at DM’ing the party continues to traverse through Dracula’s castle. They encounter unlikely foes and obstacles. For a change, the group is actually a little more clever in dealing with their obstacles. At the end of this, they will, of …
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Still on these tweeners you say? Yup! C’mon we have to really enjoy Phil’s first joint as DM! My character apparently is now obese. We are in a trap dungeon, but all the monsters suck. This is because Dennis left Phil some really shitty dice. Enjoy that asshole. We are going through all kinds of classic Castlevani…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! One Tweener down, one Tweener to go! Have we got a treat for you. Phil, in his DMing debut is going to put on a show. This one is set in Transylvania of all places. Now, I wonder what the boys could be getting up to in Transylvania? Going to whorehouses of course! A priest has hired the group to investigate the sm…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Now we have come to the final episode of our first series of Tweeners before we start Season 5. Of course, if you head to our Twitch page you could be watching Season 5 right now! However, for now, we have to deal with some vikings. Our adventurers are split as of right now. Some are spreading the viking seed. One…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! At least when the Botched boys play as viking raiders, they are playing to their strong suits: murdering indiscriminately. In this episode, they change their minds when they meet the people of North Umbria. The group decides they want to be farmers, find a family, settle down and abandon their violent tendencies. …
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! With Season 4 wrapped up that means only one thing! No, not the start of a new season. You get tweeners! Everyone loves random short stories with characters that will never show up again. In this particular story, Austin is the DM now. The rest of us are a bunch of rookie vikings, sailing towards England for fortu…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Here we are my friends, at the end of all things. This is the final episode of Season 4! It has been a wild ride, and hopefully you all have enjoyed it thus far. That being said, there is still the episode to listen to. The group is currently trying to outrun the jilted lover known as Yig. Shubniggurath is not far…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Wow, things have really taken a turn for the worst. Not only is the world ending, but the entire city of New York has erupted into chaos. Oh, and there are giant monsters rampaging around fighting each other or wreaking havoc. The group needed to split up because they forgot what they were supposed to do. One grou…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! So, the only job the group really has at this point is to bleed on a few pieces of rock. That being said...they forgot to bleed on the rock that was closest to them. Now, said rock is under a building work of rubble...and under water. Not sure if the group has time to go back, they do the smart thing in the middle…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Montana is back from the dead! That’s great on so many levels. Well, not for Montana, but it’s great for everyone else. Now that the group is back in good ol 1932 New York City, chaos reigns supreme! Turns out Father Bierce was Hastur all along. Now New York is embroiled in a giant battle between outer space titan…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Last time we left off, the group was dealing with some sort of giant mutant venus fly trap. The only person who really had a problem was Montana Jackson, who is slowly sliding into the mouth of the monster. He should be totally fine though as he slides towards a garbage disposal esque maw of teeth. The rest of the…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! As I said last week...all of our content for the end of the season was completely corrupted. So...we did the only thing we could do...re-record the whole damn thing! Never fret, I added new dangers this time around and I am pretty damn happy with it. So this time around, the adventurers are still traveling through…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Full disclosure. We had a major technical glitch which rendered the last month of our season completely unusable. We apologize for that inconvenience as we have to rerecord the entire last month, plus some other content. We did not want to miss a week of releasing content to you listeners so we decided to release …
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! So much for Bradley being dead I guess. Not even the power of death can break the incestual, I mean ancestral bonds between family members. Now that the group has made it to the door in question, the only thing that remains is to make sure the door never opens. Father Bierce said in order to seal the door, they ha…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! I guess the group cannot do anything simply. Could they just sail to the island of R’lyeh? Nah, they have to ramp off of Dagon’s head. However, now they don’t have a way back home. Well, I guess they could swim. They seem to have found an old ally once thought dead. He is dead actually, but now they can bring him …
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Well, there goes Father Bierce. At least he gave his life for what he loved...children. I mean Tedward. He was like a son to him, obviously. Tedward could not have cared less though. The group seemed as though they were definitely dead, especially since they blew up the church and had it collapse on them. Luckily,…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! What do we have here but a good ol’ fashioned combat episode. Yeah, I know they aren’t the most interesting, but sometimes they have to happen! We do have a mystery as one of our “heroes” has been taken by the cult of C’thulu! The Hounds of Tindalos have showed up to murder the group and in typical Botched fashion…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Again? They reset the timeline again?! Well, at least when they do that there are no lasting consequences. Now that they have hit the reset button they have to decide what is the best way to proceed. Also, they need to eat a pizza that they received. But wait, didn’t that happen in a different timeline? Time is so…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Now that the group has saved Father Bierce and returned him to the church, the group has to decide what to do. They discuss at length where to go next and how to proceed, but they just can’t seem to make up their minds. Half the group decides to try and abduct one of the fish men and torture them into giving them …
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! While the goose, that is currently on the loose, is the design of a patron of ours (Thanks Bean!), I have to say I am thoroughly enjoying the chaos that ensues. It seems Montana Jackson has awoken from his “coma” and is back in “action.” With the element of surprise, hopefully these idiots can overcome the superio…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! Well, a goose showing up and stealing their car keys was certainly unfortunate. However, I’m sure they won’t have too much trouble with Patron made npc though. Once they get that problem solved, they just have to go back, pick up Father Bierce without doing something stupid like...running him over or something. Th…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! I wonder if the group thinks rescuing Father Bierce is worth it? They discovered the asylum was filled with blood thirsty Bators. Those are bunnies with the heads of alligators, in case you were wondering. They also discovered these strange cylinders filled with light that really ruin the day of anything that gets…
 
Welcome to Botched: A D&D Podcast! It only took an entire episode for the group to realize they completely forgot what they were doing. Fear not, however, as the dumb dicks figured it out! Now the group is on its way to the insane asylum. The city is still in complete chaos, but it doesn’t seem to have impacted the structural integrity of the asylu…
 
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