show episodes
 
She Cums First: Promoting Females Sexual Pleasure and Male (re)Education. Good day, Dr. Nick here. This is a podcast focused on sexual health and all of the pleasures that comes with it. In the learning section of this group, there is a series called Selfless Sex where the focus is learning how to pleasure your lady. Above all, lets start a movement. Women should cum first! Who is with me? #SCF #SheCumsFirst
 
Advice for smart men on how to succeed with women in sex, dating, relationships, and marriages. Beautiful women give you a peek behind the curtain into what the feminine really craves from the masculine ... and how to give it to us. Personal growth is sexy, haven't you heard? Get in touch at dearmenpodcast@gmail.com. Take our free training for men at https://evolutionary.men/dearmen
 
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show series
 
Most dating apps for straight folks have about 90% men and 10% women on them -- so the experience for men is often one of scarcity. (If you have trouble getting matches as a man, that's normal.) So wouldn't it be great if there were an app where you could go on 8 mini-dates in an hour and a half? Filter Off is a video-first dating app that helps yo…
 
If you want a healthy, happy relationship, you'll need to address your attachment wounds. We've all got 'em to one extent or another -- and yours may be more pronounced depending on your childhood. If you've been wanting to overcome anxious attachment (or avoidant attachment) because you're suffering in relationship (or dating), you'll appreciate t…
 
How do you stay in integrity when you have women friends, as a man in a monogamous relationship. How do you handle it if your partner gets triggered over you meeting up with a female friend, and how can you take steps to prevent that? Some men naturally have more female friends than male ones, or find it easier to connect with women in life than me…
 
Many couples start out hot and heavy when it comes to sex, only to see that sexual heat fade. One of the sources of this can be unresolved sexual trauma in one or both partners ... which can be hard to talk about. How do you bring up your own need for a dynamic and fulfilling sex life when she clearly doesn't want to talk about it? Here, we look at…
 
If you're a man who has sex with women, going down on women is not a topic you'd necessarily feel safe bringing up with other women in your life. So here's a peek behind the curtain in terms of what women want from oral sex -- what we love, what we crave, what gets us hot. Whether you're wanting to know how to go down on your wife or how to go down…
 
"How do I get consent?" is a common question men who have sex with women have when it comes to sexy time. Even movie stars need help when it comes to presenting "sex" with consent and healthy boundaries. Did you know Intimacy Coordinators are a thing? They help actors, directors, and others shoot smokin' hot sex scenes that include healthy communic…
 
If you desire a fun, healthy relationship with hot, connected sex and harmonious teamwork, you can have it ... but it takes consciousness work to transcend the wounding of the past. You know you must become aware of how your parents shaped you, but did you know patterns from your grandparents and other forebears can also be involved? Here, Mark Wol…
 
"My wife doesn't like sex." "Why isn't my wife attracted to me?" "How can I fix my marriage?" These are common questions for men in sexless marriages (psychologists a sexless relationship as one where sex happens 10x/year or less). If you're in a sexless marriage, it's likely taking a heavy toll on you. It's also hard to know what's normal, since w…
 
Are you a late bloomer? When it comes to sex, dating, and relationships, there's a perception that if you're a straight man, you should have sex ASAP, and with as many partners as possible. But the truth is, a lot of men in their 20s, 30s, and beyond are still virgins (or sexually inexperienced), and we don't talk about it enough. If this applies t…
 
Ever been scared of your woman's anger, sadness, grief, or rage? It can be overwhelming and hard to handle when a woman fully expresses her feminine storm. The truth is, there are both toxic and healthy expressions and it's critical to know the difference. It's also important to know how to skillfully welcome even more emotion in your partner -- an…
 
Whether you're on Hinge, Bumble, OKCupid, Match.com, eHarmony, Coffee Meets Bagel or any of the other multitude of dating apps, you've likely experienced ghosting. Many of us have both been ghosted and been a ghost. Why? What's the motivation, and how does it affect dating and relationships? We get into all the sticky questions here around integrit…
 
How do you actually apply attachment theory to relationship, and how do you know when to get outside help (i.e. a couples therapist or coach)? The 2 top things couples argue about are sex and money, and handling that kind of conflict skillfully is challenging. Fortunately, while relationships (whether you're married or not) are complex, but they're…
 
It's a common relationship question, especially when a marriage isn't working: Should we stay together for the kids? Should I stay in this for the kids ... even if our sex life is dead? ... even if we fight all the time? Here, we explore the line between "making it work" and unhealthy relationship dynamics that do affect the kids. Sometimes the bes…
 
Modern sex, dating, and relationships often Hinge on dating apps (see what I did there?). Whether you're on Bumble, Tinder, Match, eHarmony, OKCupid, Plenty of Fish, Coffee Meets Bagel, or, of course, Hinge, your experience will vary depending on a number of factors. Here, we get personal in terms of what we, as women, experience on the apps, and h…
 
The fear of being called creepy or viewed as a pervert, whether in a sexual scenario, while dating, or even in relationship, runs deep. It can reach levels of terror, especially for men who have gotten messages about their sexuality being "bad" or "wrong" since they were young. What do you do when the fear of being creepy prevents you from approach…
 
How does being bullied early in life affect your ability to trust and connect in sex, dating, and relationships later on -- and how can it actually make you more resilient? Three men share their powerful personal stories of not just surviving bullying, but how that experience has since shaped their relationships (with both men and women) as adults.…
 
Women want to feel fully emotionally expressed around men, but where's the line between expression and abuse? Here, we take on the issue of women sharing their truth with full power (whether that's their rage, disappointment, desire, or hurt) -- when it's healthy expression, and when it's abusive. Whether you're in a committed relationship like a m…
 
Ever wished you could apply scientific principles to dating? Then you'll love this episode. Behavioral scientist and author of recent Amazon best-seller How to Not Die Alone, Logan Ury draws from social science on sex & relationships, as well as best practices from behavioral science to answer questions like: Should I give up on someone if I don't …
 
In the age of modern dating, it can be hard to know when to text vs. call vs. FB message vs. Instagram DM her... women and men, guys and girls, everyone differs when it comes to HOW they like to be communicated with. Sex, dating, and relationships are better when communication is clear and easy.By Melanie Curtin
 
Say you've gone on a date or two with a woman you're interested in sexually and then she lets you know she's not interested in you romantically. Do you stay connected with her even though she doesn't want the same thing as you? If not, what does that say about you -- and if so, what impact does that have on you? Here, Jason and I both share persona…
 
Getting a divorce can be both freeing and terrifying at the same time. Who you are post-relationship? How do you let go of guilt or a sense of failure if that's part of your experience? And what's the dating scene like now (including sex)? Here, three men share the ins and outs of their experiences during marriage, divorce, and their love lives aft…
 
As a sex researcher, I've repeatedly noticed a trend when men share with me about their love lives: Some men are more comfortable using overly sexual words, while others appear to solely be comfortable using euphemisms (i.e. "being intimate" instead of "having sex"). What does this choice of words have to do with having a healthy sex, dating, and r…
 
If you've ever felt like you're constantly the one giving in a relationship and never receiving, this is for you. If it seems like you're always doing for the other person and then feeling used and/or cast aside, this is for you. There's this thing that happens in most sexual, dating, and committed relationships at some point, and we rarely talk ab…
 
How do girls and women learn to masturbate? How does that different from boys, and how does that then inform the sexuality of each? Here, we get down and dirty, sharing our own personal stories around what self-pleasing sex is for us (masturbation), and how that intersects with our dating and relationship lives. We also discuss a surprisingly fun w…
 
If you've ever wished your partner would open up more or grow in a certain area (i.e. sexual openness or emotional intimacy), you're not alone. Where's the line between wanting someone to "change" vs. to grow, and how long should you "wait" if your partner isn't showing up in the way you need them to? Here we get real about what to do if you don't …
 
There's a frequent pattern in male/female relationships where he feels like she wants him to read her mind, he feels like he can never get it right, and she emasculates him. Here, we discuss the deeper, underlying reasons for it, how to address it, and what it means for your sex life as well as the relationship (hint: it's not good! But it can get …
 
I'm talkin' about that good good lovin': that can't-wait-to-have-you, make-the-mattress-jump, happy, good sex. Whether it's in the context of a casual dating relationship, a committed partner, or something in between, we dish our stories of the men who've given us immense pleasure. (We also cover stories of sex that was less than great, and what ma…
 
The number one indicator of whether a marriage will succeed or fail is not about the quality of the match or anything else you might predict; it's whether each person has individuated from their family of origin. In other words, when it comes to sex, dating, and relationships -- especially long-term relationships like marriages -- your ability to s…
 
Ever been in a relationship where little things set your partner off? Ever gotten the silent treatment (or had sex withheld from you) because you did something "wrong", even though it was hard to figure out what the "rules" were from day to day? Ever spent a lot of energy trying to please your partner and apologizing just to keep the peace ... even…
 
Ever been with a partner where you wanted more sex than she did? It can be more than just frustrating -- it can kill a relationship. It's not always about libido, either -- often it's a pleasure & communication issue. It's really hard for a woman to tell a man that something he's doing hurts, or isn't working. In fact, 10% of women say it's "imposs…
 
A lot of men feel like they're "supposed" to want to bang every woman they possibly can, and that if a woman makes herself sexually available, they "have to" have sex with her. But what if you're not attracted to her, or you don't feel safe in some way? We talk a lot about safety for women (which is critically important), *and* there are dynamics a…
 
When it comes to men, women, and sex, things can feel complicated. But when you zoom out, a lot becomes clear. My friend Shana James and I have collectively coached thousands of men, and seen several patterns emerge again and again. Here are the top 5 things we've learned as sex, dating, and relationship coaches for men who relate with women.…
 
Ever felt like the women you really want don't want you back? It's exceedingly frustrating (and not good for your sex, dating, or relationship life) when you feel like you're settling instead of going for what you really want in terms of attraction and the feminine. Here we delve into the personal, lived experience of anxious/avoidant attachment st…
 
If you've ever repeated patterns in your sex, dating, or relationship life, you know how frustrating it can be. Keep attracting unavailable women, or women with severe trauma? You probably want to stop doing that. And while talk therapy (traditional psychotherapy) can help, somatic therapy can be more effective. Here, a somatic therapist takes us b…
 
Yes, sexuality is mysterious, but I'll bet you didn't know there were 3 different kinds of female orgasm! A lot of women don't even know about all 3. Whether you're a man or woman, and single, dating, or in a relationship (including married), knowing about these orgasms is both fun and informative. Your sex knowledge is about to expand. ;)…
 
When it comes to talking openly about sex and relationship, couples are often strangely isolated. You don't usually discuss the intricacies of your life as a couple with friends, and a couples counselor can sometimes be overkill for what's needed. So if you're in a committed relationship (like a marriage) that's good but you want it to be great, yo…
 
Will she still want to have sex with you if you're still a virgin at 26 years old (or 29, 34 or older)? What if you're divorced or getting divorced and you've only had sex with 1-2 women your whole life? You don't have to be sexually experienced to satisfy her, whether you're dating or in a relationship. Here we talk about how to overcome the anxie…
 
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