show episodes
 
Advice for smart men on how to be successful with women in sex, dating, and relationships. Beautiful women give you a peek behind the curtain into what the feminine really craves from the masculine ... and how to give it to us. Personal growth is sexy, haven't you heard? Get in touch at dearmenpodcast@gmail.com.
 
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show series
 
Ever been in a relationship where little things set your partner off? Ever gotten the silent treatment (or had sex withheld from you) because you did something "wrong", even though it was hard to figure out what the "rules" were from day to day? Ever spent a lot of energy trying to please your partner and apologizing just to keep the peace ... even…
 
Ever been with a partner where you wanted more sex than she did? It can be more than just frustrating -- it can kill a relationship. It's not always about libido, either -- often it's a pleasure & communication issue. It's really hard for a woman to tell a man that something he's doing hurts, or isn't working. In fact, 10% of women say it's "imposs…
 
A lot of men feel like they're "supposed" to want to bang every woman they possibly can, and that if a woman makes herself sexually available, they "have to" have sex with her. But what if you're not attracted to her, or you don't feel safe in some way? We talk a lot about safety for women (which is critically important), *and* there are dynamics a…
 
When it comes to men, women, and sex, things can feel complicated. But when you zoom out, a lot becomes clear. My friend Shana James and I have collectively coached thousands of men, and seen several patterns emerge again and again. Here are the top 5 things we've learned as sex, dating, and relationship coaches for men who relate with women.…
 
Ever felt like the women you really want don't want you back? It's exceedingly frustrating (and not good for your sex, dating, or relationship life) when you feel like you're settling instead of going for what you really want in terms of attraction and the feminine. Here we delve into the personal, lived experience of anxious/avoidant attachment st…
 
If you've ever repeated patterns in your sex, dating, or relationship life, you know how frustrating it can be. Keep attracting unavailable women, or women with severe trauma? You probably want to stop doing that. And while talk therapy (traditional psychotherapy) can help, somatic therapy can be more effective. Here, a somatic therapist takes us b…
 
Yes, sexuality is mysterious, but I'll bet you didn't know there were 3 different kinds of female orgasm! A lot of women don't even know about all 3. Whether you're a man or woman, and single, dating, or in a relationship (including married), knowing about these orgasms is both fun and informative. Your sex knowledge is about to expand. ;)…
 
When it comes to talking openly about sex and relationship, couples are often strangely isolated. You don't usually discuss the intricacies of your life as a couple with friends, and a couples counselor can sometimes be overkill for what's needed. So if you're in a committed relationship (like a marriage) that's good but you want it to be great, yo…
 
Will she still want to have sex with you if you're still a virgin at 26 years old (or 29, 34 or older)? What if you're divorced or getting divorced and you've only had sex with 1-2 women your whole life? You don't have to be sexually experienced to satisfy her, whether you're dating or in a relationship. Here we talk about how to overcome the anxie…
 
Do you give blow jobs at Da Club, during casual sex, or only in a committed relationship? Do you prefer to spit or swallow? We get into all the dirty details as we explore blow jobs in sex, dating, and relationships. We touch on power dynamics as well as how porn informs our sexual scripts. There's also a LOT of laughter.…
 
Cheating is complicated. The effect of sex with someone outside your relationship (or emotional cheating in some cases) can be devastating and cause immense harm. It can also prompt immense healing, or post-traumatic growth, as we cover in this episode. The nuances of sex, dating, relationships, trust, and betrayal are covered as we reveal our pers…
 
Men aren't the only ones who struggle with dating, relationships, and sex. Women of all ages, including those just out of a divorce, have insecurities around sex, dating, and relationships, including around trust, dating etiquette, and more. We discuss what it means for women to do the work in terms of personal growth as well as growth in a relatio…
 
Sex, dating, and relationships (including marriages) have all been affected by the coronavirus pandemic of COVID-19. There are unique challenges as well as opportunities to grow here, and people are definitely still meeting, dating, falling in love, and deepening their relationships right now. We discuss dating during COVID (How do you meet people?…
 
Is it easier for men or women to get into committed relationships? What about to get a first or second date, have casual sex, or find The One? In the world of man/woman heterosexual dynamics, there's a lot going on, both culturally as well as personally (including your attachment style). Here, we explore both our own views as well as yours, as I wo…
 
A lot of dating relationships start out in the honeymoon phase -- lots of sex; fun, engaging dates; fantastic natural polarity. Then comes the first disagreement, maybe even an argument or fight. How do you deal with conflict well? How do you have a quality repair conversation, where both people feel heard and loved? How you deal with conflict, ten…
 
It's not always easy to find fun, sex-positive environments where women feel safe to be fully expressed and men also feel totally welcome. Whether you're polyamorous, curious about more open relationship-style connections, or just want a sexy, flirty vibe on a trip, there's something for you here. Temptation and Desire are the name of the game -- a…
 
A multi-billion dollar industry, porn and porn addiction have a massive impact on our sex, dating, and relationship lives. Both men and women are affected, but porn has an outsized impact on men in terms of contributing to erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and delayed ejaculation in some cases. How do you quit porn, and why should you qu…
 
What's it like to be a black man in the world of dating and relationships? What role does emotional safety play in a healthy sex and relationship life, and what is that like for men vs. women? We experience sex, dating, and relating in different ways depending on our race, sex/gender, and sexual orientation (among other things). The sometimes overl…
 
What's it like to be a black woman on dating apps? What does allyship look like in dating and relationships? What kinds of gifts do you get when you date inside your race vs. outside of it? Sex, dating, and relationships are intimate parts of our lives, and we experience them differently depending on our sex/gender, sexual orientation, and race (am…
 
When it comes to sex, dating, and relationships, we tend to repeat patterns until we break them. Many men report attracting women who are emotionally volatile (hot or cold); seemingly selfish (always take but don't tend to give); or sort of narcissistic. But there's a secret when it comes to attracting the right women. Hint: It's not about the woma…
 
It's easy to feel alone and lonely, even when there's not a global pandemic on. These three men inspire with their stories of going from stress and anxiety around sex, dating, and relationships to genuine ease. The path to deep, fulfilling, and healthy relationships with women is a meaningful one -- and doable, even if you've never gotten there bef…
 
How can men help? This thoughtful panel discusses race, racism, privilege (including white privilege), and healthy masculine leadership. Sex, dating, and relationships all unfold against the cultural background we are raised in, and we can only be good partners when we fully grasp our part in the culture. In other words, racial justice matters on b…
 
Polarity is complex and involves a number of dynamics, including men leading and women surrendering (both in sex and outside of it). But it also involves relationship "landmines" -- topics you both avoid because you're afraid it'll blow up your relationship. Here we delve into that, and the surprising sexual energy released when you both finally te…
 
Polarity is HOT when men do this in relationship! Whether you're dating or in a long-term relationship like a marriage, the dance between the masculine and feminine is smoother, easier, and sexier when men have developed this fundamental sex and relationship skill.By Melanie Curtin
 
We repeatedly see that men and women who "do the work" are the ones who get into (and sustain) healthy relationships. Doing the work almost always improves your sex, dating, and relationship life. So what exactly does it mean to do the work? (Hint: it's not always easy, but it's always worth it.)By Melanie Curtin
 
What happens in a romantic relationship when a man is more in his feminine energy and a woman is more in her masculine energy? Hint: not a lot of hot sex. Here, we go into David Deida's concepts of stage 1, stage 2, and stage 3 relationships and how each side of a couple can grow into even deeper, hotter, and more satisfying sex than ever.…
 
Whether in sex, dating, or relationships, both men and women grapple with how to be in their power. If being powerful doesn't mean being controlling, what does it mean? A woman in a relationship with a man is profoundly impacted by how much he's owning his own sense of self, boundaries, and attraction. We cover all this as well as the importance of…
 
What's a memorable time you owned your power? How about a time you didn't? Three loyal Dear Men listeners drop wisdom on sexual confidence, freezing up with a girl, how to cultivate a quality marriage, and more in this first-ever listener panel on our topic for the month: owning your power as a man in the modern world.…
 
Men are often shamed for having emotions, which is holding back men, women, and culture as a whole. As a man, how do you deal with your anger, sadness, and also your joy? How do your emotions impact your sex? It turns out a man being emotionally skillful is part of what has him feel SAFE to the feminine. Healthy women *want* a man knows how he feel…
 
How does a man being in his power affect his woman? Whether in sex, dating, or relationships, the way WE show up affects how the OTHER person shows up -- whether it's a man impacting his woman, or vice versa. This is a cool exploration of how Jason and Violet's relationship unfolded, the obstacles they navigated together, and a description of the r…
 
Women love a man who's in his power. Power isn't dominance (a point that a lot of men and women get confused). Sex, dating, relationships, and love are all served when the masculine owns his power -- and here's one man's story of going from a man who held back and waited and was passive, to one who owns his power as a leader and a lover.…
 
How do you date if you've got a diagnosis like schizophrenia, an anxiety disorder, clinical depression, or bipolar? You can always use NoLongerLonely.com, a dating site specifically designed for you! Founder Jim goes through his impetus for creating the site and his experience with sex, dating, and relationships with a clinical diagnosis.…
 
As a man, do you need a lot of money to be successful with women? Who should pay on a date, or the hotel on a weekend getaway when you're in a relationship? Here, we get honest about how we feel about men and money when it comes to sex, dating, and relationships.By Melanie Curtin
 
When it comes to men, women, dating, relationships and sex, alcohol is frequently part of the equation. But what do you do when your drinking starts affecting (or compromising) your relationship? One man's exploration of his own alcoholism is illuminating.By Melanie Curtin
 
Killing Kittens is a woman-run sex party company that also hosts sex-positive mixers and events for both men and women. Founder Emma Sayle takes us through what it was like to create the organization and how it can improve your sex, dating, and relationship life all at the same time.By Melanie Curtin
 
Whether you're single, dating, or in a relationship, if you're a man who has sex with women, you're going to want to listen to this. This skill is make-or-break in terms of attracting women and setting the feminine on fire, both sexually and romantically.By Melanie Curtin
 
The penis: it's miraculous and can also prove frustrating for some men when it comes to sex, dating, and relationships. What do you do when you can't get it up or you come too soon? Ruwan shares his personal journey overcoming erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation.By Melanie Curtin
 
If you're talking about men & women, sex & dating, relationships & turn-on, eventually you're going to talk about porn. A multi-billion dollar industry, it's both polarizing and perpetual. Respect for performers (porn stars) is just one part of the equation. Ethical porn is sexy ... and important.By Melanie Curtin
 
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