#66 - Managing Draining People and Over-Sharers (Women’s Episode)

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By Vicki Tidwell Palmer, LCSW, Vicki Tidwell Palmer, and LCSW. Discovered by Player FM and our community — copyright is owned by the publisher, not Player FM, and audio is streamed directly from their servers. Hit the Subscribe button to track updates in Player FM, or paste the feed URL into other podcast apps.

Its that time again the first episode of the month, the one that is dedicated to women and boundaries. Are you friends with someone who is draining you? Do they make you tired because they won’t stop talking? Vicki is going to give us some simple strategies to distance yourself to stop the madness.

Vicki shares with us the consequences of allowing over-sharers too much of our time, the things you can miss out on and the relief you will feel once you disengage from them. She says when we take care of ourselves and allow pure joy into our lives, we will attract people who want the same thing, thus eliminating the people who exhaust us.

Biggest Takeaways From Episode #66:

  • Not everyone feels the same way about draining people. It is a matter of perception.
  • Delay your response to a text or, if you don’t want to maintain a relationship with them, become less responsive over time.
  • Say ‘I hear you’ when someone starts to overshare.
  • Exhaustion, time loss and missing out on relationships are the consequences of allowing someone to drain you or overshare with you.
  • Do things that bring pure joy to you! Don’t waste time with things or people who don’t.

Highlights from Episode #66:

  • Welcome back to the show! Today’s episode is dedicated to women and boundaries. [00:41]
  • Vicki reads what a listener wrote in about wanting to set limits on her friends to keep the relationship equal instead of one-sided. [01:02]
  • She discusses people that over-share and are draining and how we as women attract them. [02:47]
  • What does it mean to be draining or an over-sharer? It is open to perception. [05:45]
  • Vicki speaks about signs that someone might be exhausting to you. [08:12]
  • We can feel shame if someone shares too much personal information with us. [09:02]
  • You have the right to set limits on the time the draining person gets. [09:47]
  • Decrease the amount of contact you have with a draining person if you don’t want to maintain a relationship with them. [11:24]
  • She gives us some simple strategies to limit your available time to listen to someone who is draining or want to over-share. [13:36]
  • Say ‘I hear you’ to people who want to over-share. [15:55]
  • Have you ever gone out with someone who talked non-stop? Were you drained? [17:41]
  • Once you disengage from someone the payoff the brief discomfort you feel in the moment can turn into relief. [19:21]
  • Have you ever felt overwhelmed by an over-sharer? [21:44]
  • Vicki gives us the consequences of allowing someone to drain you or overshare with you. [24:49]
  • Do things that give you pure joy. If you take care of yourself, you’re tolerances diminish for people who drain you. [27:11]
  • If you want to learn the 5 steps for identifying, creating, and maintaining healthy personal and relationship boundaries, see the link below. [29:38]

Links and Resources:

116 episodes