#99 - Back Off, I Need Some Space!

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By Vicki Tidwell Palmer, LCSW, Vicki Tidwell Palmer, and LCSW. Discovered by Player FM and our community — copyright is owned by the publisher, not Player FM, and audio is streamed directly from their servers. Hit the Subscribe button to track updates in Player FM, or paste the feed URL into other podcast apps.

Can you believe that next week will already be Episode #100? Wow! Stay tuned for something special. But for now, let’s talk about a topic inspired by the listener questions archive. Even if you love to get up close and personal with others, there has probably been a time when you wanted someone to just back off and give you space. And yes, this even applies during the pandemic! Tune in to learn how to navigate this situation and create the space you need.

Biggest Takeaways From Episode #99:

  • Both during this pandemic and after it, we’ll encounter people who don’t give us as much space as we would like.
  • Many of us tend not to take or ask for more space because we don’t want to be rude or hurt someone’s feelings. This is a self-defeating mindset, because you’re prioritizing what you think someone else’s feelings may be over your own needs.
  • You can use non-verbal methods to create space, like putting your shopping cart behind you in line, or sticking your purse, elbow, or foot out to expand your space. Another option is to be more animated, making larger movements with your arms or body.
  • If you want to say something, try “excuse me, I need a little bit more room, could you move over/back up a little bit?” Make sure you don’t place the blame by saying “you’re too close” or “you’re crowding me”; make it all about yourself and your needs, then make your request.

Highlights from Episode #99:

  • Vicki welcomes listeners to the episode and mentions her 30-day Facebook Live event. [00:39]
  • We hear the listener question that inspired today’s episode. [04:10]
  • Vicki digs into the poignant aspect of the question in light of the current situation with the pandemic. [09:48]
  • What do you do when you’re the person on the receiving end of just a bit too much closeness from another person? [14:55]
  • Vicki talks about several options for what you can do when you notice you need more physical space. [17:19]
  • We learn about an option that involves just letting someone else go ahead of you. [21:37]
  • One of the best-kept secrets about boundaries is that they’re about getting space. [24:54]

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