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No matter who you are, what you believe, or where you live, chaos and difficulty finds us all; however, is there beauty that can be found in the pain? The Colorinchaos Podcast is an honest conversation for those who seek growth through the difficulty and awkwardness of life while not ignoring the pain, uncomfortably, questions, brokenness, restlessness, and the unknown that comes with it.
 
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Episode 147 (11/17/21): No matter who you are, there is nothing that can prepare you for the death of a loved one. Born in Kharkov, Ukraine, Bradley Michael Hawkins was adopted at 15 months old by his parents Sharon and Scott Hawkins. 21 years later, Bradley’s life was cut short by a tragic skateboarding accident. No matter where today finds you, m…
 
Episode 144 (10/20/21): At times, this world can reduce us to feeling so small, so forgotten. In the moments when we see the state of our fragility, regardless of how small we may feel, we have a God who upholds… cares… and sees us no matter how small we may feel that we are.When your thoughts, emotions, insecurities, and weaknesses make you feel t…
 
Episode 142 (09/22/21): “God, where are You…!?“God, what are You doing…!?“God, why am I going through this…!?”When life doesn’t seem to make sense… underlying, uncomfortable, questions such as these, will find us all.On todays episode, join us as we look at three separate stories in the Bible and seek to better understand how each and every day we …
 
Episode 141 (09/18/21): Growing up, my grandmother used to put together big diners for our big family gatherings. As I look back on these dinners, I remember many, many times, where my dad would PLEED with her that instead of feeling the need to constantly serve, for her to instead just be present with us. Though I remember finding it funny to see …
 
Episode 140 (09/08/21): Each breath is a fragile gift… yet so much of my time is spent fantasizing about the future that does not exist. When anxieties run wild, and emotions and expectations fail us, a sobering reality looms over us... On the day that we breathe our last, nothing else will matter but Jesus.Heavy heart, what we begin in the soil of…
 
Episode 139 (09/01/21): Each day that we are alive, countless opportunities to be present, disengaged, or lost in the countless notes of emotions in between, will find us. In the moments where it is so easy to get lost in what awaits tomorrow, what has occurred yesterday, and that which we can not control, join us as we look at the Hope that greets…
 
Episode 135 (06/28/21): In a world of celebrities, and pedestals, we often hide away our messes; Yet through it all, every mess highlights something so much greater than ourselves…Heavy heart, the shadow proves the sunshine.May this episode meet to you wherever you are...Music referenced in this episode: Dante Bowe, "all god’s children" (From the a…
 
Episode 134 (06/16/21): Heavy heart, depression will NOT have the final word.The influence of Dr. Terry Powell in my life can not be stressed enough. I met Dr. Powell during my years of undergrad at Columbia International University, and I can say with confidence that he's had one of the biggest impacts not only in my life as a follower of Christ, …
 
Episode 133 (06/09/21): "So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free.”- Jesus (John 8:36)Quotes such as this sounds nice, but where is freedom in the constant moments where our brokenness finds us day after day? On today’s episode, join us as we continue from Epsiode 132 and ask ourselves, what does it mean to be a child of the God of the Unive…
 
Episode 131 (05/26/21): When we don’t know what’s going on…When our emotions and thoughts are deceptive…When our senses fail us…When we feel at the end of our rope…All feelings are valid, yet feelings are temporary.And at the end of the day… our emotions are just sensory.Heavy heart, there is a Truth that goes beyond our senses.Music referenced in …
 
Episode 130 (05/19/21): Words can’t express how much social media has changed the way we live our lives. In our attempts to express ourselves, often we take on the role of the “director” of the narrative of our life… cropping and editing each moment so that it aligns with what we desire our lives to look like. At the end of the day, is there a grea…
 
Episode 127 (04/28/21): Sometimes the book of Revelation can be so overwhelming that it is avoided; however, there is so much in what John writes in the book of Revelation that brings clarity to our day to day life in light of eternity. Back in 2013, I heard sermon by the pastor Judah Smith entitled “Keep It Clear”. As of 2021, I can not find this …
 
Episode 126 (04/31/21): “We can be a good person and still be outside of what God wants us to do.”- Karen BlanchardIn John 10:10, Jesus speaks about the abundant life that only be found in Him… yet so often it can feel like there is a disconnect between the promises of Scripture, and the reality of our lives. Is there more to following Jesus than w…
 
Episode 123 (03/17/21): “What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.”- James 4:14Time is deceptive… for it’s so easy to believe that we have plenty of it, until we don’t. No matter who we are, or what we do, death will catch up to us all… however, is there a way to truly make the most out of the time that ha…
 
Episode 122 (03/10/21): Each day, we encounter hurt, heartbreaks, insecurities, and fears…In our fear? We fight.In the fight? We doubt.In our doubt? We run.We all long to have a confidence that our days & pursuits are not in vain.May we not run away from our Creator, Savior, and Sustainer…Heavy heart, may we not settle for less than complete confid…
 
Episode 121 (03/03/21): As humans, we struggle with change... and often, we spend our days trying to relive our yesterdays or fantasizing over what changes tomorrow may bring. When we find ourselves stuck between the days gone by, and what lies over the horizon of our tomorrows, how can we be present and embrace everything that today brings..?Heavy…
 
Episode 120 (02/24/21): The Summer of 2014 found my head leaned up against a trash can, completely at a lost for words. In the moments where the plans that we once held so tightly blows away with the wind… when we find ourselves exhausted & numb… in the moments where confusion & brokenness overwhelms our heart & mind and we don’t know where to go… …
 
Episode 119 (02/17/2021): Have you ever felt as if you were in a funk? In the moments and seasons where we find ourselves overwhelmed and overcome; our loneliness, longings, and lies can begin to become the loudest voices in the private chamber of our heart and mind. Where do we go when we don’t know where to go? Where can we go to find the rest th…
 
Episode 118 (02/10/2021): All of us have had times in our lives where we have felt lost reading the Bible, times where we felt lost sitting in church, and moments where we question the relevancy of Jesus concerning our lives today. We all have times where we feel as if we going through the motions of religion and discipline while others seem to hav…
 
Episode 117 (02/03/21): Have you ever felt as if there was a dark cloud of hurt, doubt, questions, and confusion that hangs over your heart and mind? In the moments where it’s difficult to “snap out of it”, can we be honest to the Lord with the overwhelming pain that feels like it can swallow us whole? When we feel like senseless animals… there is …
 
Episode 116 (01/27/21): Church. This one word can bring so many thoughts, emotions, and memories to our mind; however, what is the church and why does it matter? In today’s episode, join us as we look at the unity that can be found despite our age, flag, background, job, social class, baggage, and gender. In these times of division, we have an oppo…
 
Episode 114 (01/13/21): No matter who we are, all of us will have moments in our lives where we feel abandoned... when the beautiful sunsets of life give way to harshest of nights.When our world crashes down around our feet, and our dreams & hopes feel distant, have we been abandoned? Whether we keep our questions close to our hearts, or we shout o…
 
Episode 112 (12/16/20): There are certain individuals in our lives whose presence brings peace and perspective, and to me, Jason Fullum is one of those rare gifts. Growing up in Detroit as a kid, all that Jason ever wanted was a true friend and the certainty that everything would be okay. Today, Jason has devoted his life to be that friend to the y…
 
Episode 106 (10/21/20): We all live in a world where there is a pressure to “have all the answers”… a world where vulnerability and surrender is a weakness… yet at the end of the day, we all crave more than what we know our hands can offer. For Karen Blanchard, this craving for more led to the end of herself, and the beginning of a journey seeking …
 
Episode 105 (10/14/20): “Basically, I'm for anything that gets you through the night - be it prayer, tranquilizers or a bottle of Jack Daniels.” -Frank Sinatra When the chaos of life overwhelms and threatens to overcome us, it doesn’t take long to begin to recognize the many voices and vices that promise to "get us through the night”; however, is t…
 
Episode 104 (10/7/20): As the seasons change around us, we are reminded that we are changing as well. In the awkwardness that each change brings, it doesn’t take long before we begin to crave some type of consistency in a world that is constantly changing. Is there a consistency to be found in the constant changes of life? Continuing from Episode 6…
 
Episode 103 (09/30/20): This life is messy. The longer that one breathes, the longer one has to realize that even the best intentions can lead to the crutches of people, places, things, and situations that promise to take the “edge” off… but end up adding even more weight to an already weighted down soul. When we find ourselves overwhelmed and over…
 
Episode 102 (09/23/20): Have you ever felt emotionally distant from a loved one? Sometimes this distance can be traced back to an isolated moment; however, sometimes the distance that is felt can last days, months, or even years. When it’s hard enough to deal with the distance between other people, how do we deal with the distance that we at times …
 
Episode 101 (09/09/20): Curious of the stories & struggles that went into the 100 episodes of The Colorinchaos Podcast? In this episode, we continue with Part-2 of Hallways & Doors by going through each and every episode and taking a moment to look at the process of growing in vulnerability, humility, and surrendering the weaknesses that comes with…
 
EPISODE 100! (09/09/20): Is our God faithful to equip us for what He calls us to? Over the span of 2 years & 100 episodes of this podcast, I'm overwhelmingly reminded that the answer is YES! Join me in this two-part 100th Episode celebration, as we talk through the origins of The Colorinchaos Podcast, the fears, insecurities, joys & hardships that …
 
Episode 99 (08/26/20): As the disciples of Jesus felt as if they were fastly approaching death in the middle of a turbulent sea, we find Jesus fast asleep through the chaos and darkness of the stormy night. In the darkness of what feels like the stormy night of present-day, you may feel as if God has fallen asleep to the cries and pleads surroundin…
 
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